jus got back frm wrk..got drenched in the rain..wanted to get totally drenched but the van uncle jus wont let me alight at the front saying tat the rain is too big.the bigger the better is wat i wan.not going to bath although my hair is quite wet now..cos i jus wanna make myself fall sick.feeling so cold now.whole day at wrk was like in hell.cried on the train there thinking of the time he send me to wrk once.maybe ppl r looking at me but i dun care anymore.cried when i reach wrk place and was talking to meiyi.she heard my voice turning weird n immediately came over to my side of the lockers to console me.started wrk at 5 n dunno cried how many times all the way till 12mn.everyone was talking to me yet i dun haf the mood to talk to them.everyone sense something is wrong with me but they jus dun dare to probe cos tis is not the usual me.i usually joke ard with them n smile alot but today i cant make myself to even put on a fake smile or talk more than 2 sentences.even the AMs sense something wrong and ask me..n i immediately broke down..in the end i got to pass over to another person to continue serving the table.i'm sorry about it but i jus cannot control the tears.everything i do tis few days jus reminds me of him.even during wrk..cos he used to sms me constantly when i'm wrking.whole day onli ate a small portion of potato salad.dunno wat is happening to me..i wish to slim down but not in this way..but now i really got no choice.he msg me ard 8 plus..requesting me to remove the picture of me n him.i really dun wan to..but i think i got no choice again.tis few days i am always left with no choice n tis is not wat i wan.i wan the both of us to be happy n yet i cant do anything more.he jus wan to hide so tat the problem will be solved.i can c he is not doing well either trying to forget me in all ways n means.now everyone even him is asking me to forget about him and i am already trying very hard but i stil cant.it is not as if i am not trying..but its real hard.everything i do, hear or see reminds me of him.i am seriously intoxicated and infected..can someone come along n save me?if not..i am jus gonna collapse soon..
